It’s been a long week. It’s finally the weekend, and I get to enjoy a few days off of work. I love my work, but with all jobs there are some aspects I could do without. One of the main problems is that work doesn’t stay at work. I bring it home and work many unpaid hours. It’s not really about not getting paid for putting in extra work that I don’t enjoy, it’s more lack of appreciation. However, many people do things without any appreciation or thank yous. I work with children from different backgrounds, cultures, and socioeconomic statuses. It’s draining, heartbreaking, and often I feel like I am failing them. But at the end of the day, it’s worth it. Helping a child learn to read, finally be able to solve a subtraction problem on their own, or start to believe in themselves is something I wouldn’t trade for the world.
I want to take a moment to talk about all the things that are going well in my life. The past few blogs have been really hard for me to admit. But at the same time, I am so thankful that I am starting to get to a point in my life where I feel that I can actually share things I was so ashamed of. There are still stigmas about mental illnesses, but I believe as a society we are opening the dialogue and changing how we view it. I am still not comfortable with sharing every part of my mental illnesses, but I’m getting there. That to me, is something that is going well in my life.
Another thing that is going well in my life, is my loving and supportive husband. He has encouraged me to talk about my problems and to seek help when needed. He is so patient with me. I know I can be a lot to handle, and I can stress people out to the max. He still loves me, and for that I will always be forever grateful to him and all he does for me. I am finally starting to believe that someone can love me. That someone can love all the good and all the crazy in me. I love him more than I could ever express.
Right now, I’m thankful that I don’t have to wake up early tomorrow! Woot, woot! I can sleep in and let the stress from this week melt away. I plan on getting back on track with my yoga and meditation. For anyone reading this, I highly suggest meditation. I always thought it was so silly. But it is amazing! I have always had a hard time quieting my obsessive thoughts, but meditation has helped me minimize those intrusive thoughts. It’s all about being in the moment, focusing your thoughts, and energy. Yes, energy. I would never have thought that word would come out of my mouth. I’m a believer. The energy you can create with your positive thoughts can really turn your day into an amazing one.
I am glad that I started this blog. I have to admit, at times I have felt like a loser. I want people to read my blog! Haha, but it’s only been a week since I’ve started. Really, the point of me starting this blog was a way to express my feelings and hopefully find ways to cope in a healthier manner. So if I never really have followers, its okay. Sometimes I just need to do things for myself and know that it’s going to help me become better. Not perfect, but better than I was yesterday.
I am curious to know if any of you reading have Body Dysmorphia. I would love to chat, and learn some of the ways you cope. Feel free to contact me with any questions, or if you want to vent. Heaven knows, I need to vent about it sometimes (or ALL the time). It’s a lot to keep to myself. Please reach out for support. It doesn’t have to be to me, but anyone you trust and would feel comfortable sharing with. As always, lets all strive to be better. Let’s treat ourselves better and treat others better.
Thanks for reading!